/Face Palm

Hey ladies and gentlemen, guess what? Ubisoft recently announced something very very stupid interesting: A new propietary service that will force you grant you the privilege of only being able to play your Ubisoft games while being connected to the internet. It will also upload all your save files to their servers automatically to hoard as much personal data as they can make you happy, because carrying a save file around in a flash drive is such a painful process and it occurs with such frequency that one wonders why the hell are they doing this they didn’t think of this before.

In fact, this DRM system has so many advantages I can only describe a few of them right now without taxing my brain:

  • No need to save your savefiles in a flash drive before going to your aunt’s house.
  • No need to have the actual disc in the drive. That’s right, no more cd-checks!
  • You can install your game in as many computers as you’d like!
  • You’ll not be able to play your game if you don’t have acess to the internet.
  • If your internet connection dies on you while playing, the game will pause, and then if connection isn’t reestablished, it will let you continue playing your game.
  • But you won’t be able to save in that case (probably).
  • If the servers are sent to the graveyard, then Ubisoft will kindly issue a patch to let you play without authentication!
  • You won’t be able to resell your game (That is, until the servers are down and the patch is issued… but at that point, how much do you think Gamestop or the equivalent is going to give you for that game? A dollar? 50 cents?)
  • Oh, and don’t forget that it’s not just you, Ubisoft might have internet problems too! A lot of MMOs have bandwidth problems at first until they eventually solve them (or go bankrupt, whatever comes first), what makes you think Ubisoft will have everything working perfectly at launch day?
  • Mmmhhh, yeah. There’s one more thing: You’ll be buying a service instead of a product, and that service is going to stay as a service until a few years later when they release the patch that will turn it into a product. That is, if they don’t go bankruupt before that happens. So, you’ll be safe as long as Ubisoft stays alive and is kind enough to let you play your game without their supervision.

The bottom line is, why is Ubisoft doing this stupid, stupid, stupid move? It can’t be for piracy, they aren’t that idiotic. Mmmmhhhh, let’s think for a second, what is the second most mentioned “problem” of the industry at hand? Piracy is number one, so that’s not it…

Oh! right! The second hand market! How could I forget about that? Yes, that’s what this is about: Ubisoft doesn’t have the balls to go fully digital just yet, so they want to squeeze more profit out of their “hardcore” games by not letting Gamestop and other companies sell their games used! That’s just brilliant incredibly stupid!

So, in essence, they grabbed the idea of Steam, deleted almost all of the good ideas it has in it and then proceeded to claim it’s how they are going to distribute their games now. Because that’s what’s going to increase your profits: Piss off your customers, eliminate a section of your audience (how many people don’t have reliable internet connection at all times? 10% of your audience? 20? 30?) and then tell them it’s for their own good.

I think I promised not ot talk about these topics again on this blog, but when something this incredibly stupid gets announced… I just loose it.

Side-note: What if they announce Beyond Good & Evil 2 for 2010? I mean, it’s not likely, but if it does come out this year and if Ubisoft doesn’t back down from this horrible idea, then  BG&E2 will come out with this garbage attached to it *shudder*


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